Twenty Almost Good Song Titles

The Lady Is of Dubious Moral Fiber

Saturday Night’s All Right for Crocheting

Smells Like Teen Spit-up

Damn Sure Shoulda Gone to Rehab

Jack & Diane & Karen

Two Fewer Lonely People in the World

Send in the Clowns Then Kill the Freakshow Bastards

King of Spain


They Are the Champions

Can’t Take My Eyes Off of Lou

Our Love Will Go On and On and On and On and On and On and On

Midnight Train to Chechnya

Long Cool Doorman in a Black Dress

I Toe the Line

Roll Over Paganini

Back in the United Arab Emirates

When Doves Whine

Isn’t It Ironic That I Have No Idea What Irony Is

I’m So Lonesome I Could Buy One of Those Japanese Blow-Up Dolls